Back in my college days, I kept a blog similar to this one. Except I updated it darn near daily, and its content was less “Oh, look at the cute baby!” and more, “Ugh, that douche bag I was ‘dating’ cheated on me and I’m really surprised.” Like, on loop. But in between all of the posts detailing my Groundhog Day of a dating life, I would occasionally write about things I did…weekend recaps and the like. And although 90% of its content is pertaining to men and drunken misadventures, I like to look back on the remaining 10% as it details the things I did that were somewhat noteworthy. Examples include graduating college, skydiving, and bungee jumping. I wrote about my travels—the year 2008 alone brought trips to Las Vegas, Norway, Mexico, Korea, and Thailand. 2008 was so momentous, in fact, that my best college friend and I have it tattooed on our bodies in Roman numerals.
10 points if you can guess during which trip that particular body art was acquired.
Anywhoo, the point is, I had a ton of adventures and got to experience some amazing places and things, and did a fairly decent job of documenting it all. I got to thinking today about why I stopped writing about the goings-on in my life, and it occurred to me that in my blogging heyday (actually, blogging’s heyday, period) from about 2004-2009, I never worked full time. And, as evidenced above, was never involved in the kind of serious relationship that takes up a significant portion of one’s time. I look back on those old blog entries often, and have found that not only are they more frequent, but they’re better written (written better? SEE!) than anything I’ve posted as of late.
Apparently all that extra time made a significant difference. Case in point: I had to pause typing this to try to put Sadie back to sleep after her twenty minute nap. That was three hours ago.
But the thing is, in the past five years or so, it’s not like my life has stopped being awesome. Sure, there is significantly less vodka involved, but the adventures remain—and now I have a husband and daughter to share them with. In those five years, I’ve gone from seeing writing as a fun hobby to share and record my experiences, to a potential career path. It’s hard to type that “out loud” without cringing a little, as I’m well aware that there are thousands, possibly millions, of writers out there who are more skilled and engaging. Hell, I’m Facebook friends with a couple of them! Approaching blogging from a place of “This post BETTER be good” seems to have backfired on me, just a bit. I’ve lost a whole lot of the raw and honest messiness that used to characterize my writing. More importantly, I’ve lost the means to record the brilliance that is waking up every day and living this life.
So all that to say, I’m hoping to do a better job of writing to remember, not writing to impress. Life’s too short not to take some notes every so often, you know? When Ryan read my last post, the letter to Sadie, he put down his phone and prayed out loud to remember. When we are older and grayer and with any luck, wiser, we both desperately want the ability to recall this life we’re living together. I want to start now, to make sure nothing is missed, forgotten…lost. So I’m doing my part here to keep our memories safe.
But that will have to be all for today, October 9, 2015. There’s a baby waking up down the hall, and I’m needed for snuggles.
(I want to remember that, too.)